I’ve been threatening to write about my experiences with dating for quite long enough. For about 8 months now I’ve had some type of online dating profile, and there have certainly been some “interesting” experiences.
If nothing else, it’s absolutely entertaining, not just to see what men post about themselves, but also what they say and how they interact with me. I swear, people don’t realize how much they give away about themselves with words alone.
If you’re a woman dating after divorce, there’s a must read article that a fellow joyfully divorced friend sent me and it finally highlights a truly practical aspect to online dating: Woman Joins Tinder to Pick Up Couch from Ikea
When I first read that article, I cried from laughing so hard – the most hilarious part was her screenshots of interactions. Because YES, that’s how most men interact. And it is hilarious.
From the beginning, I didn’t like match.com at all and once they censored my language, I was done with that site. My experience with it was creepy, and the majority of communication I received was just so stupidly beyond anything I was remotely interested in, it wasn’t worth my time. The fact that the site told me that men age 50-70 were my ideal audience should have been a clue….I was 39 at the time and thanks, but hell no.
I’ve had better interactions with the app Hinge, and yet, I’ve become much more discerning over time and at this point ignore probably 98% of messages. The most recent one that I received was “you’re absolutely gorgeous” to which my reaction was rolling my eyes thinking “and you’re absolutely superficial”. Needless to say, he’s not getting an actual reply.
The ridiculousness of what men say, share, and post is just beyond words. My personal favorite direct message I’ve received: “I just want you to admit you want to have sex with me”. Well, I’m pretty certain you’ve just eliminated any possibility of that ever actually being accurate. Seriously.
Even better have been some in person conversations with men who, while otherwise were perfectly nice, responded to my sharing the above message by telling me that they hoped I let the guy know how I perceived it.
As though I’m somehow responsible for educating men on how to behave and interact with women. What the actual fuck?! Dear men, I assure you that I have plenty of responsibility for my own behavior, I’m not interested in taking any amount of ownership for yours.
The reality of dating beyond divorce is enlightening for sure and the level of arrogance is astonishing. For any men reading this – arrogance and posturing is not attractive, and it’s evident regardless of what you think.
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